Long travel days with a toddler + dog

the actual life · field notes

Long travel days with
a toddler + dog

It's not easy — you will "fail." But is it really failing if you're traveling with your family? It gets more manageable. Here's what we actually do.

WRITTEN BY ELAINE & CHRIS

FILED UNDER: TRAVEL WITH KIDS READ TIME: 5 MIN TESTED ON: ONE TODDLER, ONE DOG

The night before

PREP — T-MINUS 12 HRS

Go to bed earlier than you think you need to. This one sounds obvious. An early night is the only thing that doesn't cost you anything in the morning. Your patience is a resource. Protect it the night before.

Get the bags done by 9pm. Set everything by the door. Then go to sleep. Wine, weed, do what you have to do.

Morning fuel

COFFEE — NON-NEGOTIABLE

The coffee is non-negotiable. We treat the coffee situation on travel days like a logistical problem to be solved, not a luxury to be hoped for. Where is the nearest coffee before we leave? Is there time to sit with it?

We treat the coffee as a non-optional line item in the travel day budget — in time, in planning, in patience preservation.

Teamwork

DIVIDE & CONQUER

Work together from the jump. You need to be clear before you even leave the house: who has the dog walk, who gets the baby ready, the packing, the cleaning, the checking out and transport.

Talk through the day together the night before, at 10pm, when you're supposed to be sleeping. Don't be upset if you have to remind each other and check in often — it's a big, busy day. But don't dilly dally either.

Switch when one of you needs a break. Check in with each other constantly. You're a team, not two individuals on parallel solo trips.

Timing

LEAVE EARLY, NO EXCEPTIONS

A buffer helps us be patient with our baby and dog, giving them the best learning opportunity and setting a precedent for future trips and experiences.

Early also means quieter airports, shorter lines, and more time to walk — which is exactly what you need to get everyone calm before the sitting-still part begins. We have never once regretted leaving early. We have very much regretted leaving late.

If you think you need to leave at 8, leave at 7:15. The extra time will disappear.

On the ground

THE IN-DAY ESSENTIALS

These three work together. They're not big strategic ideas — they're the moment-to-moment things that actually keep a long travel day from unraveling.

🍎 Snacks are your secret weapon — and they go on top

Pack more than you think you need, in more variety than you think matters. For the toddler, for the dog, for you. Snacks buy time, head off meltdowns before they start, and give you something to offer when there's nothing else to control.

The snack bag lives on top of the carry-on. Not under the laptop. Not at the bottom of the tote. On top, always accessible, always ready.

🚻 Bathrooms and public spaces are your safe havens — treat them that way

A bathroom stop with a toddler is never just a bathroom stop. It's a reset. A park is where Cali finally exhales. A public square is where Emmy finds a pigeon and forgets she was unhappy.

Learn where these spaces are along your route. We always know where the nearest green space is — before we land, while we're in transit, when we're switching modes. It's part of the plan, not an afterthought.

🏃 Spend every free minute burning energy — this is the whole game

Layover with ninety minutes? You are not sitting at the gate. You are walking the terminal, finding the outdoor area, putting Emmy down to walk, giving Cali her leash time.

Every burst of activity is a deposit toward the stillness that comes later. If there's a park near the airport, go. A grassy strip at a rest stop, use it. We never sit when we have the option to walk — not with a toddler and a dog on the same travel day.

The takeaway

Not every leg will go smoothly. Some days the coffee will be bad and the flight will be delayed and the dog will bark at the wrong moment and the toddler will lose it publicly in a way that makes you briefly question all of your life choices. That's the actual life. It's also the story.

The tips above don't prevent the hard moments. They just mean you show up to them rested enough, caffeinated enough, and prepared enough to get through them together. That's all travel days really require.

— ELAINE & CHRIS, @elsewheretogether